The line on the horizon shows the magnitude of the clouds above.
It was a beautiful day. I often find myself watching the clouds.
Our Father, Creator, our God sure does know how to get my attention.
I’m so grateful for the signs and wonders I see everywhere I look.
I find myself in awe that it has been a year and a half since I visited with you here. There are many reasons or excuses if I’m deeply honest, and I am working on finding purpose in the time gone. We will all pass down our stories of “Covid days”. An unforeseen global event we never imagined except in the trilogies and movies of the past decades.
As the restrictions were easing and life taught a new normal, I had an unexpected health event that slowed me down – I couldn’t drive for six months. In my search for a diagnosis, I discovered a world renowned doctor in our very own community. My severe balance issues were traced to something rare that was only diagnosed in the late 1990’s. Semi-circular Superior Canal Dehiscence (SSCD) is the thinning or absence of bone at the top of the eardrum. Apparently I was born missing that bone and my body was always able to compensate for any challenges presented. And then I crossed the 65 year mark and it got tired I guess.
My doctor worked with me with vestibular exercises and a medicine to reduce pressure in my head for six months then we determined surgery was the next step. He performed a small craniotomy and used bone from inside my skull to close the hole. All so interesting. He had also discovered two holes in my mastoid and repaired those. There were at least a million other things happening to my body and the feeling of having to depend on my friends and family for every little thing was a challenge for me. I couldn’t lift over ten pounds and just for reference sake – a gallon of water weighs 8 pounds. I slept sitting, propped up by cushions on my sofa. For months and months.
Today, six months post surgery I am doing well. My Dr says to give my body a year or so to regain all the parts and pieces of myself working together to balance my movements. This body is so fascinating. I saw my doctor this week and he cleared me to fly again. After fourteen months with my feet on the ground, this is a huge deal to someone whose tagline is jlkestogo. I’m boarding that plane this week and heading to Honduras. I’ve been gone far too long. My heart has been patient and has waited anxiously for this day. I will be at Mi Esperanza, finalizing my residency for another term and working on some personal projects. You can visit us at www.thewomenofmyhope.org.
Our God has given us each a gift of incredibly designed bodies. I have learned so much about the small part of me between my ears and my skull, my eyes and my feet and the role each of them play in my ability to function as I now drive and live on my own again.
The unexpected events have brought many unexpected opportunities for gratitude. I was truly grounded, more helpless than I had ever been in my life and searched to regain my new normal. It seems to have become a practice in my life now. Anticipating a new normal will become a common occurrence in my life as this world becomes more and more unpredictable.
Yet, in that quest, I have and continue to learn new ways to circumvent the uncertainties.
I know that nothing ever lasts.
2 Corinthians 4:18 ESV “as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.”
I know my remaining days will be expecting the unexpected.
Ephesians 3:20 ESV “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us.”
I know how to live by being still.
Psalm 37:7a ESV “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;”
I know not to fear the unexpected.
Isaiah 41:10 ESV “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
I know now that God was present in my past, in my present and my future days are numbered by Him.
Psalm 90:12 So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.
I know I want to serve Him until my dying breath leaves my body.
Psalm 16:8-9 ESV “I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices; my flesh also dwells secure.”
I know that my Redeemer lives and He lives for you too!
Job 19:25 ESV “For I know that my Redeemer lives, and at the last he will stand upon the earth.”
Our God gave us a sacred gift carrying the physical, the spiritual and the emotional. How we receive that gift is up to us. Free will is another part of our gift. What will you decide to do with yours? How will you live your remaining days? When you experience your own personal health or other crisis, how will you respond? Learn more about your relationship with God. Allow Him to draw you near. Stop putting the most important things off until a more convenient time.
May you find peace that moves you to wanting a deeper relationship with God. Being loved by God Is the best!
“Lord, we come together today asking Your grace and mercy to shower over us as we examine our relationship with You. May our eyes be open to see and our ears open to hear. Your mercies are new every morning and we want to see You in every thing. We praise Your holy name Father, Abba. Amen”
