I love sharing my adventures and journeys through photographs. Anyone who spends any time with me knows I’m always looking for the beauty surrounding me. My pictures reflect what I see. They do not reflect what’s going on in me and around me. I never want to mislead anyone to think my
life is . . . pardon the pun . . . picture perfect. The only thing perfect about my life is the God who created me and the same God who loves me through thick and thin.
There is a country song that has always stuck with me – “no matter where I go – there I am”. Filling time with busyness – even the good stuff – brings no resolution to the crud that is hanging out inside. Can we outrun it? After living sixty plus years, I don’t believe we can. We will spend our days exerting all our energy to outrun the bad stuff chasing us, demanding our attention. So many times I hear myself express how tired I am. Others too, chime in, lamenting the heavy feeling we share.
But, the feeling is heavy. Tidal waves of challenges threaten to sweep us off our feet and forever out to sea of hopelessness. The battle is real. To my younger generations of readers, I want you to know, we see your mountains. We see your struggles as you manage single parenting, addiction and mental illness. Many of us face them with you. Many of my friends are raising their grandchildren. Some, their great grandchildren. We still love you because we remember how Jesus loves.
My personal mountains – I want you to understand how not picture perfect my life is – living alone after divorce with an ocean of ripples, grandchildren I will never hold because they left this world sooner than any of us would have chosen. Conflict within our family – division – living through my daughter’s divorce. Drugs. Addiction. Disease. Grandchildren who no longer have both parents in their lives, or barely. Alcoholism. Serious mental illness, watching the effects of the struggle internally and externally in my family. Grandchildren who live with challenges we don’t comprehend. Diagnosis. Autism. I’ve been in the ER multiple times with over dosed loved ones. Suicide hovers. There is a moment in time when someone has to check for a pulse. It’s hard. Answering the phone in the night, not knowing if it will be the police, the hospital or the coroner’s office. But I love my people hard and fierce. I have fought the battle to keep God with us. I pray over them when they sleep. I pray over tough conversations. I will fight until I breathe my last breath. I pray. Constantly.
There are so many more that could be added to that list, but I want to move on. Not to outrun or distract myself from the problems but to bring God into the mess in the midst of us.
I want to move beyond the fear because all of that above – because that list right there – wants to keep me a prisoner – keep my focus on what’s around me – not what’s in me.
If you have been following my journey for long, you know I write about how and where I see God. I write about how I hear Him. I write about the touch of the wind which always reminds me of the Holy Spirit’s presence in my life.
I’m constantly seeking His presence around me because it connects His presence in me to the outside world – His creation. My passion for photography keeps me connected to God.
You don’t know all the pieces to my mountain, I can’t know all the pieces to your mountain. This life is full of opportunity to encourage each other isn’t it?
I want to change the words to that song – “no matter where I go, God is there”.
I pray we never lose the ability to see the beauty in this world our God created. I pray we never lose sight of His love for us.
“I leave my peace with you. I give my peace to you. I do not give it to you as the world does. Do not let your hearts be troubled. And do not be afraid.” John 14:27 NIrV
Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. Philippians 4:6-7 The Message
“Lord, we come to You. We know from experience You meet us right where we are. You come into the midst of our messes and You replace fear with Your peace. Let us open our eyes. Help us to stop running away and to trust Your promises. Help us Lord. We cry out to You – on our knees, in the dark of the night, wherever we face our enemy – fear. We love You, Lord. We know You know us and You journey with us as we face the mountains before us. Amen.”