A New Season

Thanksgiving is over and fall is pretty much behind us. Today begins a new season. For some it is a season of celebration. A season to decorate the house, put up the tree, buy gifts, go to parties and maybe even Christmas caroling. Maybe you live in a place where there are great hopes of a white Christmas. Maybe you celebrate Christmas with sand between your toes.

Travel plans are finalized and menus or dinner reservations complete.

It is the season that faces us at every turn. There is NO escape.

For quite a few years now – the season of Christmas has been a season of dread as I prayed it would pass with the greatest possible speed and end the turmoil and pain inside me and take the memories with it. As hard as I wished them away, the days still ticked by one by one.

I haven’t decorated  in years now – I haven’t done much to prepare, again, for several years – a hollow space inside me begging to be numbed from the pain of loss associated with the season. I’m guilty of going through the motions pretty much for my grandchildren and my children. The smile on my face never quite reaches my eyes.

Is it possible a new season is appearing on the horizon of my life? December 1 is here. There has been much chatter about advent on my radar these past few weeks. I am paying attention.

Something is happening deep inside me. A release. A reason to let go of all those memories that drag along the sadness is appearing on the horizon. A discovery of new purpose, new hope and new energy is coming.

Having grown up in a family that always celebrated the secular holiday, but were not permitted to acknowledge the spiritual (it’s ok – just another piece of the puzzle that makes me who I am) – I am finding great comfort in refocusing my thoughts into the true purpose and the unbelievable opportunity we have to turn this season into one of worship.

I’m an explorer by nature – always intrigued by possibilities and wondering how and why , yet knowing with certainty – this year IS going to be different. Committing to myself to quit allowing the crummy “stuff” so long associated with this season, this year is going to be a season of discovery. Every day I am going to focus on a new aspect of Jesus’ life and His birth and how – again – right in front of my face I am reminded of how much God loves me. Exploring new ways to experience His love is going to be amazing.

So as December begins, I can honestly say to you, I am SO excited! There is no way to know how beautiful this season is going to be. Today my little Christmas tree went up. Really quite a feat for me – and a lot of help from my daughter. Emotionally, I am proclaiming a new season for me.

“Lord, You know how hard this time of year is for so many of us. It is really hard God. Please give us the courage to be brave and open our hearts to You. We want to know You in ways we never have before. We want to release the dreadful and dreaded emotions that have kept us prisoner for so long. We want our focus to be on You and the incredible act of love You gifted us with when You sent Your son to this earth for us. Prepare us for this act of exploring and draw us near to You in new ways in this season.  We love You Lord. Amen”

Join me in the journey of exploring as we seek a peace – the peace of the season and declare it new – a new season of delighting in discovery of how many ways God loves us. Because…this I know…Jesus loves me and He loves you.