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Dead Flowers

I'm not even sure how it happened. But - when I wasn't paying attention - they died.

I’m not even sure how it happened. But – when I     wasn’t paying attention – they died.

In a conversation with a friend the other day we found ourselves wondering how much of a reflection the status of our home housekeeping has to do with the status of our internal housekeeping.

It didn’t take me long to admit – mine is all connected.

Life can get so hectic sometimes that it begins to take on a heartbeat of its own. It gets real bossy.

Focus gets shifted to the list which is also taking on its own life.

When my creative self is in full swing, I am quite good at implementing my tunnel vision which blocks out anything in the peripheral part of my world.

So – when I paused for a minute from my keyboard and looked up, that’s when I saw my flowers I love so much – sunflowers and zinnias – but was shocked to realize they were dead.

I say I love them but I forgot to care for them. All they ask for is a little water – a little love – in return for the joy they give me. Ugh.

. . . and I realize how often I forget to look up – look around – and truly focus my gaze – to see – my ear – to hear – what’s happening around me while my mind is caught up in that tornado of lists and the “to do” – that is undone.

My list of “undone” is longer than my list of “done” and I feel it all closing in.

It’s the same way in my relationship with God. I forget. Failure to see Him all around me – right in front of my eyes just like my flowers here. He is patiently waiting for me to pay attention – so He can fill me with the joy of His presence.

Slowly, the tornado loses its energy when I stop feeding it by taking on life on my own. You know, like the harder I try the harder “it” gets.

I have to change my focus. What am I looking at?

When I slow down and pull out of the tunnel, listen to my favorite worship music, hang out with my dogs, I can fold that load of laundry and not even think about it. I can unload the dishwasher, make the bed, vacuum and take out the trash. It clears the clutter outside first and then it moves inside – when I come up for air, remove myself from the tunnel I had fallen into and look around.

I pray for fresh eyes too. Sitting here looking at my dead flowers – yes, they are still sitting here – I’m grateful for the opportunity to refocus – my energy – my eyes – and let the sweetness of God’s presence surround me. Restored vision on what matters and letting His presence fill me up.

It would be silly of me to ever believe that I won’t wake up one day without a list – all those bossy “to do’s” – but I am grateful for the reminders all around me of God’s presence  that keep the energy out of the tornado – maybe a thunderstorm or maybe a hundred – but they lose their ability to rotate and turn into tornadoes when I choose to bring God in.

So – in the process of writing this – my thoughts have shifted from the chaos around me and in me to naming them as storms – storms of chaos, clutter and criticizing myself because of my failure to keep up.

And my gratitude for God’s love grows – it isn’t going to end up dead sitting right in front of me.

He stills the storms.

Always.

Forever.

Psalm 57:1

Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, 

for in you my soul takes refuge; 

in the shadow of your wings I will take refuge, 

till the storms of destruction pass by. 

“Father, God, we praise you when our lives get crazy and You show up in big ways. May our eyes be open to see the reminders You present to us – may we be freed from the tornadoes of life that keep us locked in the tunnel vision of busyness. We love You, Lord. Amen.”

Now excuse me while I take the dead flowers out. Have a great day everyone!

 

 

 

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